Everyones All Loved Up

I know I am better off on my own, it's far better to be alone than to be alone in bad company. This time of year is so over done and exposed in shops and social media that you cant help but feel alone and kind of ashamed for it. It got me thinking of my big post I did a few years ago and about the fact that although I am free the damage is still there.

I spend my days at work listening to my love country music and recently heard a song that got me thinking, that is kind of how I am feeling/ thinking. I am not saying I want to be with anyone in particular or for the sake of being with someone, just  wanted to get this off my chest I suppose. What ever this post is.

The song is "Better Man" by Little Big Town, the perfect song title for this post, not so perfect lyrics, but hey we're all about reading between the lines right. Listening to music is a great way for us to work through things and for me, this song made me reflect on how I feel for the lose of being in love. Not in love with him, but IN love, if that makes any sense.

Yes had he have been a "better man" or a man at all things may have turned out differently, but there's no point on dwelling on what if's because that will never happen. The point I am trying to make is that a couple of lines from the song ring true with me, " I see the permanent damage you did to me, Never again, I just wish I could forget when it was magic".

To be honest I am not really sure what I am trying to get at here, just that with abuse there is permanent damage and I guess I am never going to get rid of that, but I wish I could. Having been on a couple of dates and finding that I seem to attract a lot of the same kinds of boys, is a little disheartening. I hope that I can find someone out there for me.

But in the meantime, I am happy on my own with Harley in our own little bubble.

I may not have a partner, own a home or have a child but I do have amazing friends and a fur baby.

Always be kind, you never know what personal battle people are fighting.

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